The day had finally come. Hope would be buried today. I was not ready for this day. How was I going to make it through? I think I went through most of it in a daze. I couldn't think. I didn't want to think. It was a beautiful service, though, and the Lord did help me through. One of the songs that Nathan picked out for the funeral was actually a song that I had sung over and over the night I was in the hospital. It's called Rejoice in the Lord.
Rejoice in the Lord
God never moves without purpose or plan
When trying His servant and molding a man.
Give thanks to the LORD though your testing seems long;
In darkness He giveth a song.
I could not see through the shadows ahead;
So I looked at the cross of my Savior instead.
I bowed to the will of the Master that day;
Then peace came and tears fled away.
Now I can see testing comes from above;
God strengthens His children and purges in love.
My Father knows best, and I trust in His care;
Through purging more fruit I will bear.
O Rejoice in the LORD
He makes no mistake,
He knoweth the end of each path that I take,
For when I am tried
And purified,
I shall come forth as gold.
When trying His servant and molding a man.
Give thanks to the LORD though your testing seems long;
In darkness He giveth a song.
I could not see through the shadows ahead;
So I looked at the cross of my Savior instead.
I bowed to the will of the Master that day;
Then peace came and tears fled away.
Now I can see testing comes from above;
God strengthens His children and purges in love.
My Father knows best, and I trust in His care;
Through purging more fruit I will bear.
O Rejoice in the LORD
He makes no mistake,
He knoweth the end of each path that I take,
For when I am tried
And purified,
I shall come forth as gold.
It has not been easy and sometimes Nathan has to remind me, but I know that I can still trust in the Lord.
Our prayer that day was that God would use the service to bring some of our friends to Christ. Our pastor did a great job of presenting the gospel and we continue to pray that it had an impact on people's lives. I am so thankful for the promises of God so that I can know I will see Hope again one day. I Thessalonians 4:16-17 "For the Lord himself shall descend from heaven with a shout, with the voice of the archangel, and with the trump of God: and the dead in Christ shall rise first: then we which are alive and remain shall be caught up together with them in the clouds, to meet the Lord in the air: and so shall we ever be with the Lord." I can't even imagine what it would be like to go through this without knowing I would see Hope again.
I did hear the other day that a friend of mine has been sharing our story and through it 2 people have gotten saved already. God does have a purpose and plan in everything He does. It doesn't make it hurt any less and if I can be completely honest, a big part of me says, "I don't care about them, I want my daughter back!" But as the song above reminds me, God doesn't make mistakes and I can and will rejoice in the fact that there are at least 2 more people that will spend an eternity in heaven. And I will continue to pray that others will come to know the joy and peace that Nathan and I have in our wonderful God and Savior. With the help of some of my friends, I won a stamped penny necklace on Facebook from Design By Any Other Name (https://www.facebook.com/DesignByAnyOtherName). I had her stamp Romans 15:13 on the front as a reminder that I can still have joy and peace, even in this difficult time, "through the power of the Holy Ghost." And of course, I wanted Hope's name on the back.
My penny necklace
She even made a key chain for Nathan.
"Now the God of Hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing,
that ye may abound in hope, through the power of the Holy Ghost."
Romans 15:13
Hope's Teddy Bear
This bear kept Hope company at the funeral home
and now it keeps me company when I need
something tangible to hold on to.
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